Ryker: I don’t trust any plus signs anymore, except in math.

Ryker: Mom, I need you to chant “chug” for me. (taking a shot dose of his cold medicine)

Me: CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!! (said from another room)

Ryker: I need you in the room with me.

Ryker: I feel like that dog was staring into my soul.

Garren: Ryker how’s  your week been so far?

Ryker: Like a cougar in a bathtub.

Ryker: Now it’s a Congo line of cars. ( in the drop off at middle school.)

Garren (12, speaking to me): I shall pass you, it is imminent! I will grow like a tree!

Ryker: Wait. Middle school doesn’t have any recess??

Me: Nope.

Ryker: So you’re saying I should be happy now while I still have it?

Me: Ryker did you make your sandwich for lunch?

Ryker: Ya, but I accidentally ate it. Will you make me another one?

Ryker: I keep lots of secrets. Then I forget them.

Ryker: You can drink anything. It’s the power of the blender!

Garren: I never really loved church, but now I think I’m going to marry it. It’s awesome!! (He started middle school group today.)

Ryker: Garren, I’ll show you mine if you show me yours. (He was referring to his video game.)

(Ryker walks into the room.)
Me: Hey dude, what’s up?
Ryker: Nothing, just exercising (flexes his biceps), and waiting for Friday.
(It was Wednesday. I’m pretty sure he was checking to see if his iPhone was easy to snatch under unprying eyes.)

Garth: I think rebates are really just an IQ test.

Garren: I can’t wait to learn the choke hold. (He was referring to what he’ll learn at the babysitting course when he turns 12. He meant the hiemlich.)

Ryker: Should I wear my high heels and special socks to school or not? (Trying to think out his day with his fun plans for after school. He meant high tops!😂)

Ryker: You can mostly trust me.